2/08/2010

Feminist Musings From Hedon? That Or I'm Really Tired

I've been reading a lot online in blogs of late about various different ideas of feminism, which are as varied and different as the gap between Christianity and Aethism. One thing they all agree on is that a lot of men have a bad habit of making assumptions about what they're allowed to do or say to women.

I've also learned from personal experience that this is doubly so for transwomen. If a man isn't disgusted by me and assuming he has a right to shove me around, he's assuming right off the bat I'm a porn shemale stereotype who will be gratefully receptive to crude advances.

Last month for example a security gaurd took exception to my using the women's washroom at a Safeway, and assumed that he just automatically had the right to call me a faggot and grab my breasts to see if they were real.

Also on several of the social networking sites I'm on for the purpose of making friends, (I'm already married), I get messaged by several jerks in a day who willfully ignore the parts of my profile that read "married", "lesbian" or "NO GODDAMN MEN", and proceed to message me with lewd come-ons or long-winded speeches about how they want to marry me and make a god-fearing woman out of me, completely disrespecting my clearly stated boundaries. Then when I very clearly reiterate my "not interested, they seem genuinely mystified by the very concept that I don't want to jump down their pants.

Cis women know all too well the joys of presumptive sexist men and their skin-crawling charms, but they need to know trans women suffer from the same sleaze. Now I'm not for a moment saying all men are like this, but if you define as a woman, cis and trans alike, there will always be men who honestly believe it's their god-given right to treat us like sexual property, and are incapable of fathoming the idea of us not liking it when they do.

We are all women, and we all have the right to expect to not be treated like meat. The kind of man who will call you a bitch if you say "Not interested" all need to learn that we are not obligated to be their fantasy. We belong only to us, and the only person we have any obligation to is we ourselves.

2 comments:

  1. Nobody should feel like they are "meat". There are just some crappy people out there. This is one reason I do not dance anymore. It gets too crazy sometimes. I'm glad you're writing :)

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting, try to NOT be crude or mean-spirited. You can disagree with me without calling me a fat bitch etc.