Crossposted on Pam's House Blend
As a woman who is mixed race, overweight, intersex, and a lesbian, I've had to put up with all the major ism's and bigotries we all know and love. (Snrk). Racism, sexism, fatphobia, ageism from teenagers who think anyone over 30 is useless, homophobia, transphobia, etcetera. I know all too well that bigotry causes harm and is destructive.
But earlier today I got sucked into an argument with some now former friends on Twitter over Ableism and it reminded me that every "ism" is a double edged sword and that humanity in general is mostly selfish self-absorbed lazy cowards unable to take responsibility for themselves.
Ableism for those unfamiliar with it is fear and/or abuse of physicaly and/or mentally disabled people. As a disabled person also, I'm not in the least oblivious to the fact that ableism DOES exist and treating disabled people dismissively as if they're automatically useless, crazy, lazy or faking for sympathy happens a lot and can be very hurtful and destructive. But like so many "isms", I find more often than nor it's a cheap defense used as an excuse to be coddled or protected from reality.
I'm sure most of you have heard about yesterday;s shooting in Arzona, which among other things left a goddamned NINE YEAR OLD CHILD DEAD. Now to me, when something that bad happens, the last thing I'm thinking about is me or how words make me feel. My thoughts were squarely on the dead child and feeling heartbroken and angry that this even happened.
Naturally a lot of people think the shooter was completely batshit and said so on Twitter. As someone with a history of mental issues this, according to my ableism fighting "friends", should automatically hurt my fee fees and mortally offend me.
It doesn't. The bastard who opened fire in a crowd to kill a judge and a senator clearly is not right in the head. All evidence says he was a Teabagger, a group of bigoted hateful people to begin with, most of whom are very much not right in the head. From people who still insist Obama is Muslim or foreign born despite overwhelming evidence otherwise to people who spend millions to prevent GLBT equality at all costs while letting homeless people, including children starve, I have ZERO problem with anyone calling these hatemongering delusional fuckwits "crazy people".
But to bitch at people for calling the shooter crazy and go into conniption over how you "won't stand for ableist fuckery" when a child is dead is not only bullshit but a serious lack of priorities. So I told them to get their priorities straight and focus on the real victims. They proceeded to just shit on me and act like I was betraying them to the "enemy".
They both ended up blocked when I got sick of trying to get through to them. And it reminded me that isms can all too easily be abused.
Seriously? How many people do you know who, should something not go their way, almost immediately blame an ism for it? A black man or a woman doesn't get the job they applied for and immediately accuse the employer of being racist/sexist? I know some employers are and would find excuses for it to avoid hiring "undesirables" but they're statistically few and far between. I know a gay man, friend of my parents, who is a complete and total douchebag, who actually accused the staff at A GAY BAR of being homophobic for tossing him out after other patrons complained he was drunkenly hitting on married men who told him no.
Well fuck that noise. It's bullshit cowardice. It's selfish self-absorbed responsibility deflecting stupidity. It's someone immediately claiming bigotry as a crutch because they don't want to deal with their own flaws.
I'm in a wheelchair. I don't whine and bitch and treat the world like it's out to get me. It's not Joe Blow's fault I'm in it, why should I expect him to coddle me?
I used to cut myself when severely depressed. I don't blame anyone else for that. No one put the razor in my fucking hand. No one forced me at gunpoint to put it to my skin. I did that. Me. My stupidity and I take responsibility for it.
So why can't anyone else just own their own shit? Why do people whine and bitch and think only of themselves and expect the world to hand everything to them because of something innate like skin color or sex or sexuality or something unfortunate but unchangable like a permanent disability? Why does everything that doesn't go your way HAVE to be someone else's fault?
Sometimes people DO screw you. Sometimes bad shit IS someone else's fault. When it is by all means hold them accountable. But when it isn't? Just deal with it already and move on. Learn from it, grow as a person, be better than you are now. Don't hide behind an ism to avoid admitting you need to work on something.
Seriously humanity, grow the fuck up already. Focus on the shit that causes REAL damage. Fight bigotry that's hurting people tangibly. Don't just sit and whine about your own feelings as if they outweigh the rest of the world.
After all, a child is dead. Is a bruised ego really more urgent than that?
Showing posts with label Legal Issues. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Legal Issues. Show all posts
1/09/2011
10/22/2010
Every So Often, the System DOES Work!
Cross-posted on Pam's House Blend
I was just woken up by an unexpected phone call.
Normally, this would be extremely irritating as you can imagine. I barely get much sleep, so being woken up when I actually was passed out is a pet peeve.
This however, was a wake-up I can definitely forgive, as it was the BC Supreme Court Crown Counsel calling me.
For anyone who is unfamiliar with my legal battle with Safeway Co. Ltd. please direct your attention here, here, and here.
Why would Crown call me less than a week before my final court date? To inform me that, as the man whose job it is to prove I'm guilty of the crime I'm charged with and convict me, he has, after two months of investigation into the testimony and evidence presented during the first part of my trial in August, determined that Safeway's case is so full of gaping holes and blatant transphobia that it is not even worth the Court's time to persue it further.
I no longer have to law awake at night fearing the system won't care about the transphobic bullying I endured by Safeway employees that lead to the false shoplifting charges, or hope I may be found not guilty because proof and justice were on my side.
Because the Crown decided Safeway's bullshit was so mind-numbingly obvious he COMPLETELY DISMISSED THE CHARGES!!!!
Apparently, inasmuch as he was willing or able to tell me, his attempts to procure interviews with the abusive security guard who the arresting guard was forced at my first hearing to admit WAS there and had been suspiciously left out of his report completely, he determined my version of events was clearly the accurate one and that the security guard who testified had a vested interest in trying to pretend otherwise.
I don't know if I have the energy after a year and a half of my life has been chewed up by this to actually SUE Safeway, but I'm damned sure going to Ask them to reimburse me for the items I had paid good money for which the security guards confiscated wrongly as stolen property.
Today, I am a happy kitty. Sometimes, the system DOES work for us.
I was just woken up by an unexpected phone call.
Normally, this would be extremely irritating as you can imagine. I barely get much sleep, so being woken up when I actually was passed out is a pet peeve.
This however, was a wake-up I can definitely forgive, as it was the BC Supreme Court Crown Counsel calling me.
For anyone who is unfamiliar with my legal battle with Safeway Co. Ltd. please direct your attention here, here, and here.
Why would Crown call me less than a week before my final court date? To inform me that, as the man whose job it is to prove I'm guilty of the crime I'm charged with and convict me, he has, after two months of investigation into the testimony and evidence presented during the first part of my trial in August, determined that Safeway's case is so full of gaping holes and blatant transphobia that it is not even worth the Court's time to persue it further.
I no longer have to law awake at night fearing the system won't care about the transphobic bullying I endured by Safeway employees that lead to the false shoplifting charges, or hope I may be found not guilty because proof and justice were on my side.
Because the Crown decided Safeway's bullshit was so mind-numbingly obvious he COMPLETELY DISMISSED THE CHARGES!!!!
Apparently, inasmuch as he was willing or able to tell me, his attempts to procure interviews with the abusive security guard who the arresting guard was forced at my first hearing to admit WAS there and had been suspiciously left out of his report completely, he determined my version of events was clearly the accurate one and that the security guard who testified had a vested interest in trying to pretend otherwise.
I don't know if I have the energy after a year and a half of my life has been chewed up by this to actually SUE Safeway, but I'm damned sure going to Ask them to reimburse me for the items I had paid good money for which the security guards confiscated wrongly as stolen property.
Today, I am a happy kitty. Sometimes, the system DOES work for us.
8/20/2010
Feeling a Little Hopeful At Last
Crossposted on Pam's House Blend
Before I begin, please read these older blogs I wrote in January for some background on my ongoing legal drama.
Consider Me Reminded
Giving Up Is Sometimes Survival
Now, after I had written both of those, I found out at my preliminary hearing I was in fact by LAW in Canada, NOT allowed to enter a Guilty plea if I did not believe I was in any way guilty of the crime I was charged with. After telling the Duty Counsel and the Justice Of The Peace my story and why I was pleading guilty, they informed me that by admitting that I did not feel I actually WAS guilty they refused to accept my plea. They understood why I wanted to, but assured me that Jail Time was NEVER a likely sentence for a minor shoplifting offense and that it would be tantamount to lying under oath. In tears I plead Not Guilty at the reccommendation of a judge and an agent of the crown whose job it was to prosecute criminals.
So yesterday, August 19th, was my trial date. I was apprehensive. My treatment at the Port Coquitlam court in January had not left me feeling terribly reassured in the fairness of the Legal System, and I had still been unable to re-locate my witnesses from the Safeway Parking lot.
And then the Judge called me Miss. He made it a point to clarify with me what titles and pronouns were appropriate for me, and on the rare occasion he fucked up a pronoun he caught himself and immediately apologised. While he did at times seem a little condescending in his need to explain every single procedure to me, he was otherwise bending over backwards to be accepting and supportive.
That alone gave me hope. But that's not all.
Only one of the security gaurds involved in the original incident in June of 09 showed up. The one who made the transphobic statements didn't attend, and the one who did had gone out of his way to exclude any mention of him from his official report.
And the gentleman who DID show up stumbled badly. He had trouble remembering details without his notes. He fumbled badly at EVERY turn. And I caught him in BLATANT lies that even the Judge scolded him for. Among the biggest lies was, when asked by the crown about my emotional state, he claimed I was neither emotional nor upset nor crying, but he felt I was angry and wanted to hurt him.
There was just one problem with that claim. And when it came time for me to cross-examine him with my own questions, (I can't afford a lawyer nor do petty shoplifting offenses qualify for legal aid), I nailed him with his own evidence.
This is the photo the LPO took the day of the false arrest. It was submitted into evidence months before the trial. Holding my copy of it, I asked Iyer, the LPO, to confirm his contention that I was neither crying nor emotional but simply angry I'd been "caught". He stuck to his story.
So I asked the Judge to look at my eyes in the photo and tell me what he saw.
The Judge said he saw, as this close-up shows, "Red puffy eyes, clear evidence of recent or current crying, and tears visible on my cheek. As it's a scan of a photocopy of a print-out the tears may not be fully visible here, but the Judge saw them clearly enough on his copy.
When the Judge asked him to explain why his own photographic evidence contradicted his memory of events, Iyer was at a loss, and hung his head mumbling a vague excuse about not remembering.
The trial ran long and the Court neared closing time, so I unfortunately had to have an adjournment until October, the earliest possible date in which the Crown Prosecutor could be free to resume trying my case. So sadly the ordeal isn't over yet.
However while I'm not going to jinx anything by saying this might be a slam-dunk, I AM very hopeful right now for a number of reasons.
- Iyer was caught in enough inconsistancies and outright lies that even the Judge scolded him.
- Despite my best efforts to maintain my composure while explaining my juvey rapes to the court as my reason for going out of my way to NOT break the law as I would rather die than go through that ever again, the Judge could see the tears and emotion I was fighting to NOT show and expressed sensitivity and understanding to it.
- The Crown, whose job it is to prosecute and convict me, when going over the adjournment with me and asking me about my dumpster-diving for restaurant leftovers, expressed far more concern about whether there were aid resources I could look into to survive better than garbage food than about any details of the case.
Get that last one folks? The GUY WHOSE JOB IT IS TO CONVICT ME was more concerned about my health and living situation than about discussing the actual trial.
As I said, I won't jinx anything by garaunteeing an outcome, but I feel very hopeful right now. Things SEEM to be leaning in my favour. And it gives me hope that there are places in the legal system where a trans/is woman like me can and will be respected, treated kindly, and taken seriously.
And hope is a very wonderful feeling. And I feel it so rarely that I need to share it. I hope that the hope I'm feeling right now might creep into the hearts of all my Trans Sisters and brothers. Hope that sometimes, people in Authority ARE capable of accepting and respecting us, and sometimes, just sometimes, the truth actually matters when it comes to our lives.
I'd rather share hope than misery. So the buffet is open brothers and sisters! Help yourselves! And wish me luck come October that this thing will finally end and I can move on with my life.
Before I begin, please read these older blogs I wrote in January for some background on my ongoing legal drama.
Consider Me Reminded
Giving Up Is Sometimes Survival
Now, after I had written both of those, I found out at my preliminary hearing I was in fact by LAW in Canada, NOT allowed to enter a Guilty plea if I did not believe I was in any way guilty of the crime I was charged with. After telling the Duty Counsel and the Justice Of The Peace my story and why I was pleading guilty, they informed me that by admitting that I did not feel I actually WAS guilty they refused to accept my plea. They understood why I wanted to, but assured me that Jail Time was NEVER a likely sentence for a minor shoplifting offense and that it would be tantamount to lying under oath. In tears I plead Not Guilty at the reccommendation of a judge and an agent of the crown whose job it was to prosecute criminals.
So yesterday, August 19th, was my trial date. I was apprehensive. My treatment at the Port Coquitlam court in January had not left me feeling terribly reassured in the fairness of the Legal System, and I had still been unable to re-locate my witnesses from the Safeway Parking lot.
And then the Judge called me Miss. He made it a point to clarify with me what titles and pronouns were appropriate for me, and on the rare occasion he fucked up a pronoun he caught himself and immediately apologised. While he did at times seem a little condescending in his need to explain every single procedure to me, he was otherwise bending over backwards to be accepting and supportive.
That alone gave me hope. But that's not all.
Only one of the security gaurds involved in the original incident in June of 09 showed up. The one who made the transphobic statements didn't attend, and the one who did had gone out of his way to exclude any mention of him from his official report.
And the gentleman who DID show up stumbled badly. He had trouble remembering details without his notes. He fumbled badly at EVERY turn. And I caught him in BLATANT lies that even the Judge scolded him for. Among the biggest lies was, when asked by the crown about my emotional state, he claimed I was neither emotional nor upset nor crying, but he felt I was angry and wanted to hurt him.
There was just one problem with that claim. And when it came time for me to cross-examine him with my own questions, (I can't afford a lawyer nor do petty shoplifting offenses qualify for legal aid), I nailed him with his own evidence.
This is the photo the LPO took the day of the false arrest. It was submitted into evidence months before the trial. Holding my copy of it, I asked Iyer, the LPO, to confirm his contention that I was neither crying nor emotional but simply angry I'd been "caught". He stuck to his story.
So I asked the Judge to look at my eyes in the photo and tell me what he saw.
The Judge said he saw, as this close-up shows, "Red puffy eyes, clear evidence of recent or current crying, and tears visible on my cheek. As it's a scan of a photocopy of a print-out the tears may not be fully visible here, but the Judge saw them clearly enough on his copy.
When the Judge asked him to explain why his own photographic evidence contradicted his memory of events, Iyer was at a loss, and hung his head mumbling a vague excuse about not remembering.
The trial ran long and the Court neared closing time, so I unfortunately had to have an adjournment until October, the earliest possible date in which the Crown Prosecutor could be free to resume trying my case. So sadly the ordeal isn't over yet.
However while I'm not going to jinx anything by saying this might be a slam-dunk, I AM very hopeful right now for a number of reasons.
- Iyer was caught in enough inconsistancies and outright lies that even the Judge scolded him.
- Despite my best efforts to maintain my composure while explaining my juvey rapes to the court as my reason for going out of my way to NOT break the law as I would rather die than go through that ever again, the Judge could see the tears and emotion I was fighting to NOT show and expressed sensitivity and understanding to it.
- The Crown, whose job it is to prosecute and convict me, when going over the adjournment with me and asking me about my dumpster-diving for restaurant leftovers, expressed far more concern about whether there were aid resources I could look into to survive better than garbage food than about any details of the case.
Get that last one folks? The GUY WHOSE JOB IT IS TO CONVICT ME was more concerned about my health and living situation than about discussing the actual trial.
As I said, I won't jinx anything by garaunteeing an outcome, but I feel very hopeful right now. Things SEEM to be leaning in my favour. And it gives me hope that there are places in the legal system where a trans/is woman like me can and will be respected, treated kindly, and taken seriously.
And hope is a very wonderful feeling. And I feel it so rarely that I need to share it. I hope that the hope I'm feeling right now might creep into the hearts of all my Trans Sisters and brothers. Hope that sometimes, people in Authority ARE capable of accepting and respecting us, and sometimes, just sometimes, the truth actually matters when it comes to our lives.
I'd rather share hope than misery. So the buffet is open brothers and sisters! Help yourselves! And wish me luck come October that this thing will finally end and I can move on with my life.
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