10/14/2011

Time Travel Has Been Discovered!!!

Because that is SERIOUSLY the only logical explanation for how this piece of misogynist horseshit from the 1950's can possibly exist today.

Unless the design team was headed up by either Phyllis Schafly or Wendy Wright, or a middle class teenaged white girl who's watched WAY too much of Pretty Little Liars, there is no way in hell a woman was even so much as consulted in making this game.

The game advertises itself, condescendingly, as being "Finally! A game for GIRLS!". It boasts the ability to turn your virtual self into a "successful lady" who shops constantly, (seriously, every mission set has a "go shopping at the mall" goal of some sort), changes her look like a drag Lon Chaney, (again, a makeover goal of some kind is in nearly every mission set too), and find a boyfriend.

The boyfriend finding is of course a social climbing game, as your virtual boyfriend is scored by his job and thus how much money he gives you. If you don't like the first one? Just dump him and try again! But oh, don't date TOO many guys girls, you don't want to be a slut, and playing the field means you'll NEVER be happy or fulfilled!

Which is funny, since the game pretty much ONLY rewards you FOR acting like a stereotypical vapid slut given how the people who would make a game like this most likely would define a slut. It's classic mixed signal slut shaming. You HAVE to bag a boyfriend to be a successful fulfilled "Lady", you HAVE to slut around some to bag a RICH boyfriend who can take care of you, but don't you dare ACT like a filthy slut you vapid little tart!

Classic misogyny. This is what sexist men think all women should be striving for, not silly things like falling in love on her own terms, or having a successful carreer.

Ohhhh, employment, yes. The game DOES let your virtual woman find a job. Because it's all progressive like that. Yes, you can find a job..... baking cookies, or serving cocktails. But nary an executive or management job to be found. Oh silly me, why would I think a girl could ever get or even want a job like that? After all, a job is just a temporary source of money for clothes and make-up until we finally land our Mister Right to foot all the bills!

I am honestly legitimately surprised there isn't a blowjob minigame wherein you hit the up and down keys in rapid succession to raise points for some arbitrary score about how much you can use sex to exert control over your man.

Maybe in the next update?

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